Hair update

Two months of hairgrowth has taken me from biker chic to little boy.

 

 

Halo Clinic - Week Eight

The left posterior pin has broken a perfect run and lost pressure for the first time, decreasing from 8 to 5. The tightening was unusually unpleasant and has left me with a bit of a headache. However, it has answered the question of, has the screw fused with my skull? Apparently not yet.

The nurse also confirmed what everyone was wondering and said that, "The infection was deep. We were basically down to the bone". Totally unlikely, but I just can't shake the paranoia that when I lie down, the pin will puncture through some rotten skull and pop my brain. That's what I get for scholar googling "halo brace complications" and learning the phrase, "cerebrospinal fluid leakage from a halo pinhole".

Don't never trust Dr Google!

Also, I hope I'm as classy a bobblehead as Clooney when the halo comes off. We have similar haircuts.

Stay gold, George.

Halo Haiku

Combing greasy hair.

Dandruff flurries down like snow.

Goodbye, vanity.

Eating my breakfast.

Eggs spilling from fork to lap.

Can't look down to see.

Fashion? Irrelevant.

No one's looking at my clothes.

Rocking the halo.

Sleeping? Yeah it's fine.

I lie on my side. No probs.

I've said that a lot.

No, I can't shower.

Hosed down like an animal.

Thanks for reminder.

The pins are crusty

Fetid, Oozing, Infected

Totes Unnecesary.

Chores that I can’t do,

Laundry. Chopping. Mopping. Dishes.

Halo’s a free pass.

Only four more weeks.

Goodbye consequences of

Broken-ass neck.

So, your friend has a neck/back injury...

On a forum that I frequent, someone recently asked what they could do for their friend who was laid up with a back injury. It's not often that I consider myself an expert on something. Normally, when I am interested in a topic, I know just enough to know how much I don't know and so usually I couch my information-sharing with all sorts of qualifiers, and so nobody considers me an authority on anything.

I mean, I did/do research in Obesity and Type 2 diabetes for five years, but let's all listen to my friend who read an article last week about coconut water on news.com.au. :)

The Dunning-Kruger Effect. Or, "Unskilled but Unaware of It"

Anyway, I feel like I am now an expert in what it is like to live with a halo brace! So I shall share with you my advice to this generous person who asked what they could do for their injured friend.

Halo Clinic - Week Seven

Another week done and dusted. Well and truly on the home stretch now!

Discussion of the clinic under the classic Demotivational Poster.
  

Take care on waterslides over the Australia Day long weekend, kids.

So, how's the weather (antenna on top of your head)?

I am starting to have a gutful of the halo. It seems to be all I talk about anymore. I do like having an easy conversation starter, and I appreciate that people ask because they care and are genuinely interested. But I have said the same thing about sleeping approximately 98 times ("Yeah, I sleep fine, on my side usually, and with something next to my cheek so it doesn't feel like my head's hovering in air"). And I have said the same thing about showering about 49 times ("I hose down my bottom half and rub the top half with a flannel. Can't wait for a shower!"). And I have said why I have the halo probably about 20 times ("I fell off a waterslide on to my head.")

I should come up with some more amusing answers before I go to tomorrow's birthday party with lots of interested, well-meaning people. For my amusement.

--

I left something behind in my halo clinic today. The nurse came running after me to return it. I said to her, "Thanks, I would forget my head if it wasn't screwed on."

Far out, I'm funny.

--

Speaking of funny, had the best encounter in the shopping centre the other day. Waiting in line at JB HiFi to purchase a Chromecast (It's great!). An elderly man made a bee-line right for me and stood nose-to-nose staring at me, eyes agog. "Are you real?" He gaped.
"Yes, I'm real. I broke my neck."
He turned to his carer/companion. "Is she real? She says she's real."

Bless his lil old soul. :)

Halo Clinic - Week Six

Week Six of Halo clinic is done and dusted! Only five weeks more to go.

Pins are still infected. Back on antibiotics. For those who are following, this means that the nurse from last week wins! Cephalexin this time. Hopefully that does the trick. I feel like I'm doing my part to contribute to the scourge of antibiotic-resistant bacteria.

Suh pretty Petri

Funny story about the antibiotics. I dry-swallowed a capsule and it must have got stuck midway down my throat and dissolved. Because I thought I felt a burp coming on and let it out through my nose-- cue twin puffs of smoke from my nostrils. I am a dragon!

Screwed

Greg's mum Tes kindly took some photos of my infected screws. Sharing them here in case you thought having your head screwed on would be a barrel of laughs!

 

This is my Bon Jovi Moment

Halo clinic - Week Five

Week five has been conquered! It was a good week. I caught up with my mates for the $15 steak at The Odin and we brainstormed how I could gussy my halo up for my friend Neil's wedding in February. Other topics: Dominating the photobooth. Tearing up the dancefloor with The Robot. Charging through the crowd for the bouquet. The usual.

All of these plans come to naught because after today's halo clinic, I have a finish date, and it is six weeks away, and is the day before the wedding!

Not exactly halfway through yet, but this was too good to wait a week.

But I know-- I have only been in the halo for five weeks! And 12 weeks is the recommended period of time! To which I say: Keep your doubts to yourself, haters! I'm blowing this thing! And then I'm having a shower!

That may have been the highlight of the clinic, but plenty of things happened today!

Alright, Stop! Shower Time.

One good thing about having been on a months-long camping trip prior to breaking my neck, is that I had already come to terms with an intermittent shower schedule. Compared to some of the roughest, hottest, filthiest terrain that Australia has to offer, the amount of filth I develop sitting around the house is negligible.

Still, I wish to retain a 'social life' and 'basic human standards', so foregoing showers completely isn't an option. After four weeks, I think I've found my groove.

Under the jump is my routine. I don't talk about anything funky, but you probably only need to read it if you have a halo brace and are trying to do things independently because you are hardcore and don't need to lean on anybody.

This is probably going to be my first move after the halo comes off.

Halo Clinic - Week Four

Officially one-third of the way through!

Happy New Year!

Happy New Year for 2015!

Do's: Have fun.
Don't: Break your neck.

I didn't attend any New Years parties because Halo + Crowds = Eyepatch and/or concussion for unlucky person/peoples.

I have been watching a lot of Law & Order: Criminal Intent.

That's cool though, my whole life is a party.

Wishing everybody all the best for 2015!